Wednesday, January 13, 2010

idiot #1 and #2

Every once in awhile, I run across a parent (or set of parents) who leave me speechless with their stupidity and lack of parenting skills (or maybe both). Even worse, I had been warned by hubby, so I shouldn't have been so shocked. And yet... I'm still shaking my head.

Last night at my son's wrestling match, a teammate of his was wrestling and as soon as things weren't going his way, he started bawling. Hubby told me about the tears, but I wasn't quite prepared for how much this boy acted like a baby.

I also got a close-up view of the lack of intelligence sitting three people down from me. It was a bit scary. After losing, the boy tromps over to his mother and father, sobbing for reasons unknown. Okay, I guess I can understand crying because you lost your match, but not bawling at this decibel nor what happened next. He started screaming at one parent or the other (I couldn't really make out what he was saying through all the whining and tears.) Then, when the parents either couldn't understand him or didn't give him what he wanted, he KICKED HIS MOTHER!!!

The father sitting next to me (not the father of this child) told me it would be suicide if one of his kids did that to him. I couldn't agree more. I was stunned. First, that this happened and second that the parents DID NOTHING ABOUT IT. They didn't even look surprised.

My kid would have been hauled out of the gymnasium, had a severe "talking to" and then would have been marched to his coaches to explain why he would be leaving and wouldn't be allowed to wrestle his second match. Then at home would be some real consequences that I'd dream up - like cleaning toilets and handwritten apologies and hmmm, I'm sure I could come up with something fun. I seriously doubt a child would try something liking kicking a parent after all of that.

But there was none of that last night. The mother looked slightly embarrassed but did little else.

This boy's second match was even worse. I had a little bet going with the guy next to me about how long it would take the kid to start crying. He guessed 30 seconds and he was almost dead-on. Halfway through the first period, this boy got put on his back by a far superior wrestler and started squealing like a stuck pig. This isn't an exaggeration. Tears on the wrestling mat, while silly, are common in youth wrestlers. Screeches are not and especially when they reverberate across the gym so that there was no mistaking the source.

I know we all take the easy way out once in awhile. But, it boggles my brain when people cannot figure out that if they consistently do that with children, they are only inviting more problems and more fights and more meltdowns later on. Giving in now to bad behavior like this does nothing but delay the issue and permit it to grow into a bigger, much more difficult issue in the future. Do I deal with this now when it's a small battle or do I allow it to become an all-out war when my child is 9 or 11 or 16?

So, here's to you - idiots #1 and #2 - for reaffirming my decision to discipline my children as consistently as I can, so as to not raise brats. Thank you for providing me with a perfect opportunity to praise my son for not acting like a baby after he lost his second match. And most of all, thank you for showing me that my children, even though I get frustrated with them, are pretty darn good kids. Compared to yours, my son is a gem.

2 comments:

salubriousdish said...

Amen. Glad I wasn't there. Hey, wait a minute, I'm never there. That one meet I went to Charlie lost everything so I think everyone thinks I'm a bad luck charm.

I'm with you, sister. That's bad.

Ronda said...

I don't even know what to say about that. It's the most idiotic thing I've ever heard. I probly woulda marched over and chewed the whole family out.